I started fasting on the 8th of January not eating or drinking until after 5 pm for 10 days. Everything was great. Fast was going great. I will even say going perfect.
Day 3 – today I got a call 12:51 am 🙈🙊 totally convicted me so I was up repenting.
(You know something I have not cried. Tears are bottles up. When I do cry it is going to be over something simple but my tears will be the whole bottle worth 😂🤣😱😜🙊🙈.)
Back to our conversation – You see I am not working and God is not allowing me to work because He wants me to TRUST him. This word he spoke to me all the time in 2016 and 2017. He would say “Do you Trust me”? My rebuttal is “yes LORD of course I do you are GOD”.
So I do things to make money and God says “I am supplying your needs”. I have been here before and want to work. I apply for jobs and God will say they will not respond. He says “You work for Me”.
To my family and some friends think I am lazy. People just don’t understand. So the prophetess called and said “stop making it about money. Do it unto the Lord.” You see my Mum is here and I normally pay for her and take her wherever she wants to go. I live with my daughter and girls; she needs contracts to sustain the household. Only thing I can do spiritually is pray, fast and listen for God to speak. Naturally I cook and clean and help with her clients but I want to contribute financially.
Well, let tell the truth it has been about money because I have no income. I got so convicted by the word. I repented but put myself under the foundation because I don’t know how to be happy without let alone how to trust God at this level or dimension in Him.
I have been here before but this time it is so hard. People try and give me money God says “you need to give it away or buy something for an event I am having”.
You know something I am questioning my Trust in God. What does that mean? How do you trust God who you don’t see and ignore what you do see? I trust Him for my breath but I guess I been doing it so long I think it is mine and not Him allowing me to breve. People say and I say “TRUST GOD” but do we know what we are telling people and what people are telling us.
Day 3 – Focus – Father How do I trust you? What is trust? How do I trust you and be happy? How do I trust when people have abused that area of my life? I need to trust again so I can move forward. You know something, when I thing about it I don’t trust. I need the Father’s help to restore, repair, and renew my abused, jected up trust so I can trust again. Father help me please!
Day 1 and 2 was great – Day 3 with 7 more to go. 😱🙊🤦♀️ Father HELP ME PLEASE!
Not sure why I am bleeding on you about my TRUST issue. I feel like the woman with this issue of blood and I have had distrust for 20 plus years Now and I need to be healed.
DisTrust is something we all deal with but I don’t every remember someone teaching or preaching about trust. We enter life trusting someone to care for us but then someone comes along and abuses our trust. Once trust is broken it is never repaired, restored or renewed; or is it?
Trust cuts so deep and so hard that even when the knife, person, or people have left, your TRUST is not left but changes from TRUST to DISTRUST.
We operate with DISTRUST and believe it is TRUST. It is not until God tells you the problem and He wants to restore, repair, and renew you back to His original intent foryour life.